By Guest Contributor – Rachel Bailey M.A., CPDPE
If you feel helpless when it comes to getting your kids to listen, you are in very good company. The truth is, most parents simply don’t have effective tools to get their kids to cooperate.
You know that yelling, nagging, and threatening to take away electronics don’t work in the long run – and often they’re as much of a nuisance for you as they are for your kids.
So here’s a different solution: Be a detective. Your job, as a detective, is to figure out WHAT YOUR KIDS NEED to be successful.
The next time you ask your son to clean his room and he doesn’t, ask yourself what he needs to be successful. Does he need to make the task a little more stimulating by placing baskets around the room and shooting the (non-breakable) items into the baskets?
The next time your daughter refuses to stay in bed at night, ask yourself what she needs to be successful. Does she need more focused time with you during the day so she doesn’t crave your attention at bedtime? Or does she need a strategy to manage the thoughts that come into her head when she’s lying by herself in bed?
Of course there is a chance that you might know what your child needs. Fortunately, every good detective has a tool. (What would Sherlock Holmes be without his magnifying glass?)
Your tool is CURIOSITY. The next time your child refuses to listen to you, instead of asking with judgment, “Ugh, why is he DOING that?” ask yourself, with curiosity, “Hmm, why IS he doing that?”
Your answer will likely tell you what your child needs…so that they can finally listen.
—
About Rachel Bailey:
Rachel Bailey is a stress-free Parenting Specialist who has been serving families in Northern Virginia for a decade. Besides being a mother of two, she also has Master’s Degree in Clinical Psychology and a certification in Positive Discipline. She has worked as an ADHD and Academic Coach, Intensive In-Home Mentor, and psychotherapist. Rachel is committed to helping parents feel good about themselves — from providing hands-on tools for raising children who meet their full potential…to helping them conquer the guilt, pressure, and overwhelming feelings that are associated with parenting today. For more information, please visit her website at www.Rachel-Bailey.com or email her at Rachel@Rachel-Bailey.com.
—
Stay tuned for monthly blog posts from Rachel Bailey! She will be a regularly featured contributor on our blog and we would love your feedback and comments on the wonderful insight she bestows upon us. 🙂
Be Wise!
“This is my 1st visit at WISE with my son. So far I am very thankful and impressed by the space. I feel light and comfortable here while my son works on his growth. I appreciate that you curated the process well.” ~ WISE Family parent
— Thankful and impressed by the space“I went home and practiced what Dr. Amy taught me…and it worked!”
— 8-year-old coaching client“My friend raves about what Cleo has done for her son!” ~ Parent of an inquiring new client
— Parent of an inquiring new client“Dr. Amy is like Oprah – she’s the neighbor you love who is very, very smart”
— Parent of 14-year-old son and 18-year-old daughter