By Guest Contributor – Rachel Bailey, M.A., CPDPE
You’ve probably heard that being consistent with your children, or doing what you say you’re going to do, is very important. Consistency in your actions teaches your kids that they can trust you… and it also motivates them to take you more seriously (because they know you’ll follow through).
But how can you follow through with everything when you are overwhelmed with juggling so many priorities?
Here are 2 tips for remaining consistent, even when you’re exhausted:
Tip 1: Don’t make a promise (or consequence) when you’re upset or angry.
When we’re upset – or frustrated or stressed – we say things you don’t mean. We threaten to take away
our daughter’s phone for a week. We tell your son that you we take him to the park if he doesn’t clean
up his toys. Often these consequences are not ones we want to (or can) enforce when the emotional moment is over. Instead of making threats when you’re upset, determine how you’ll handle behavior
when you are thinking more clearly.
Tip 2: Focus on one or two things to be consistent with.
Since you don’t have extra time or energy, don’t make too many commitments that require you to follow through. Instead, choose one or two things that you can consistently commit to. That could sound something like “When you speak to me disrespectfully, I will not respond,” or “After school we will have a 30 minute break and then do homework” or even “Friday night will be pizza night.” Tell your children your intention and then do what you say you will.
Once these commitments become routine, adding more later is easier. And since your kids will have
proof that you mean what you say, they’re much less likely to test your limits. Who doesn’t want that?
About Rachel Bailey:
Rachel Bailey is a stress-free Parenting Specialist who has been serving families in Northern Virginia for a decade. Besides being a mother of two, she also has Master’s Degree in Clinical Psychology and a certification in Positive Discipline. She has worked as an ADHD and Academic Coach, Intensive In-Home Mentor, and psychotherapist. Rachel is committed to helping parents feel good about themselves — from providing hands-on tools for raising children who meet their full potential…to helping them conquer the guilt, pressure, and overwhelming feelings that are associated with parenting today. For more information, please visit her website at www.Rachel-Bailey.com or email her at Rachel@Rachel-Bailey.com.
Thank you so much for your post, Rachel! This was an excellent example of Habit #1 that went out this past week to kick off our 12 Habits of a Wise Family series. Habit #1, which posted this past Wednesday, addressed that Wise Families thrive on commitment. Commitment means sticking to what you’ve promised…sometimes hard to do when juggling a busy schedule! If you stay consistent with your actions, commitment as a whole family will be stronger.
Until next week, Be Wise!
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